Trust is a fragile thing.
We want to trust and to be trusted. Some say love is the foundation for relationships, but in love, there is trust. Can you love without trust? Yes, you can. But that love isn’t a perfect love.
A perfect love—the kind of love between God and a man or woman. That’s perfect, unconditional love. God said in His word—and I’m paraphrasing here:
I’ll love you forever, no matter what. I’ll always be with you. I’ll never leave you. I’ll fight your enemies for you. What they intend for harm, I’ll turn and use it for good. You will face hard times and hit bottom, but I’ll be there with you. I’ll lead you out of the dark tunnels in life, and I’ll get you to the light. When times are tough, rely on me. I’ll shelter and comfort you. Know that everything has a season, but no matter how hard, I’ll get you to and through it, because my love is unconditional. Nothing about you is a surprise to me because nothing exists which I did not create. I know your mind, your heart, your past, present and future, and I’m here for you. I gave you free will, and you don’t always make the best choices. I warn you, nudge you, gift you with internal alarms, but sometimes you exercise your free will to heed your choices and ignore mine. That’s okay. If you walk with me, follow my laws, I’m going to use these less than stellar choices to make you wiser and stronger and turn these choices into experiences that will guide you to better future choices.
God says all that and more. Note that He granted us free will. He won’t violate it. That’s why everywhere in the Bible there are two parts to miracles, two parts to His intercession. Seek and then you’ll find, for example. Seeking is your choice, exercising your free will. Do that, and He can guide you to find. Can’t guide you unless you seek. That’s a violation of your free will choice not to look. Check it out. Every miracle in the Bible is two parts. You act, then He does.
There are so many lessons to us in these things. Two-part: if you want to be trusted, then be trustworthy.
Parents love their kids . . . except some don’t. If they all did, there’d be no abuse, neglect or mistreatment.
Mothers love their babies… except some don’t. If they all did, there’d be no . . . you get my point.
Men love their wives, and wives love their husbands . . . except some don’t. If they all did, there’d be no . . . again you get the point.
No matter what group or demographic you insert, there’s always an …except some don’t.
The one exception to that is God. God loves us.
That’s it. Period. No exceptions.
I often imagine Him being amused by us in the same way my children would amuse me. Grappling, trying to figure things out, and those Eureka! Moments when a mental pretzel becomes clear. Nothing about us surprises him, of course, but I’m confident He rides our life’s roller coasters with us—of course, He does. He loves us.
Trust is a fragile thing. And often we put our trust in the wrong things and in the wrong people. Often we are disappointed in them, when we should be remembering that they too are seeking and, like us, have limitations. No one is capable of giving more than they have to give. Is capable of doing more than s/he is capable of doing.
We are not perfect. We are instructed to seek to be perfect. To love one another as ourselves. Love without trust is putting a house on a weak foundation. And once trust is broken, it’s broken. Everything then is suspect. Can the breach be healed? Yes. How?
By getting our house in order. God first—He is perfect. If we seek Him, walk in His ways, we become more like Him. We become more trustworthy, more perfect.
Take, for example, the child who repeatedly lies to the parent. The parent doesn’t hate the child. The parent loves the child but hates the action—the lies. But if that child admits the lying, expresses remorse for it, ceases lying in the future, the parent forgives and trust rebuilds. It takes time and battles with the demon doubt, but it does rebuild and repair. It takes admission, remorse, cessation, forgiveness, and time in which the child’s word proves true to do it.
The same holds true for a parent who lies to his/her child.
This has gone in an unexpected direction. I intended to talk about trust and its applications in our daily lives. In a sense, I have, but not as I thought. I wanted to talk about trust in God through our tough times, through our downs and ups and in defeats and triumphs. I wanted to talk about trust in ourselves, our families, our friends; our associates, our co-workers, our businesses; in our neighbors, communities and leaders.
In a way, I guess I have. To be trusted, you must be trustworthy. That’s the bottom line. You either are or are not, and you choose which you will be. By what you accept in others, you either condone or refute. And we all know that what you condone, you own.
So if the relationships in which you’re involved are troubled, seek first to heal them. You know where the answers to what they should be are. You know who to look for for guidance and direction. The answers are there, waiting only for your free will choice to be made to seek them.
Ah, I see now. The real heart of this message is there. Trust. In. Him. First.
Do that, and you find your way. Trust is and should be a fragile thing.
Perfect love is not.
P.S. New book release! Down and Dead in Dixie
Warning: this is an unedited, chat-zone…